Fight/flight (sympathetic) and rest/digest (parasympathetic) are two states of the autonomic nervous system. The ANS is controlled only by the unconscious brain, so nothing we do on a conscious level can have a guaranteed outcome - we are not in control! In each state, there is a change to the skeletal structure of our body, as well as our organs, fascia and bodily functions. Our nervous system state is constantly changing and if it is parasympathetic over 50% of the time we are more likely to experience health, adaptability and the potential of our body’s innate healing mechanisms.
In order for our unconscious brain to choose to be in parasympathetic, we need enough information about what is happening around us right now to know we are safe. We cannot consciously tell ourselves we are safe - we have to provide ample sensory information to our unconscious brain about the reality of our present moment. One of the ways we can do this is to put our attention on physical things existing here and now, through sensing two points of location inside our body, or through sensory feedback via touch - like with a weighted blanket.
If our unconscious brain does not have enough information about what is happening here and now, it will always err on the side of caution and choose to be fight/flight. This is so we are prepared to protect ourselves from danger that we could be unaware of - because we aren’t paying attention.
When we are thinking about feelings, sensations, past or future events, or anything that does not physically exist here and now, our brain will put us into a sympathetic nervous system state. We still feel emotions in parasympathetic, we just don’t focus on them or think about them. We allow our body to experience them fully without our intervention.
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